


The Build a Relationship with Yourself Toolkit
STEP FOUR
VIMOR
Take your phone and place it on do not disturb. Then mount it into the phone holder with the selfie camera toward you and test the angle. Once you have the right angle turn your phone around in the holder to use the front facing camera for making the video. This is to keep you from looking at your phone while talking in the True Mirror. Refer to the diagram below on how to set the angle up. If you’re using your phone to also listen to the meditation, it will make transitioning to this step much smoother. As a back up plan, incase you feel stuck on what to share about have the “Vimoring Prompts” below pulled up to use for inspiration.
To complete this step, talk to yourself in the True Mirror with your phone recording the conversation. Once you’re done, grab your notebook and while watching the playback, make a list of compliments and judgements that come up as you watch the play-back. If there is a judgment that feels really painful, this can be an emotion to work with in the next step, but overall this detail of this exercise is mostly for tracking and overall awareness.
Also make note of anything that sticks out to you that you feel curious about. This is what you will dive deeper into in Step 5.
You don’t need to work all these feelings out at once, unless you really feel inclined to. Take a week picking apart one video. Do what feels right for you, baring in mind that we want to take the path of least resistance (the easiest and more comfortable), which in this case isn’t always the best path.
If you feel stuck on what to talk about, don’t beat yourself up! Feeling like you don’t have anything to talk about is your protective parts coming up! When in new relationships, we take time to open up! This is no different in a relationship with the self.
Vimoring Prompts - Talking to yourself during the Vimoring Step can involve various creative and engaging approaches. Feel free to use these suggestions as a starting point, and let the conversation evolve naturally. Remember that Vimoring is a practice for self-reflection and self-connection. The key is to be authentic and open in your dialogue with yourself, fostering a deeper connection and understanding.
Share a Fun Fact:
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Share an interesting or amusing fact about yourself.
Recite Your Favorite Joke:
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Lighten the mood by sharing a joke or a funny anecdote. Laughter is a great way to connect with yourself.
Reflect on Recent Experiences:
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Share your thoughts on recent experiences or events in your life. Discussing your day or recent adventures can be a natural way to start a conversation.
Ask for Advice:
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Seek advice from yourself on a particular topic or decision you're facing.
Tell a Personal Story:
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Share a personal story from your past, perhaps a childhood memory or a significant life event.
Discuss Current Interests:
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Talk about your current interests or hobbies. Whether it's a book you're reading, a hobby you're pursuing, or a new recipe you want to try, sharing your passions can spark a conversation.
Ask Open-Ended Questions:
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What are your most treasured memories, and what makes them so significant to you?
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What does personal growth mean to you, and how do you actively pursue it in your life?
Express Gratitude:
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For the opportunity to connect with yourself in this unique way.
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For a friend or family member
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Something positive that happened today/week/month.
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For the way a song makes you feel.
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For a hardship that taught you something.
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For a moment where everything felt aligned and connected
Share Future Goals:
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What are my dreams for next year?
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What have I always wanted to do but never did?
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Where do I want to travel?
Practice Affirmations:
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Share positive affirmations with yourself. Use the Mantra/Affirmations list to do this exercise.
Imagine an Ideal Conversation:
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Envision the ideal conversation you'd like to have with yourself. What topics would you discuss, and how would you support and encourage yourself?
Here is a list of more questions to get you talking!
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What are the things I did when I was younger that I miss and don't do anymore?
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How do I envision my ideal life, and what steps can I take to move closer to that vision?
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What are the most significant values and principles that guide my decisions and actions in life?
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When do I feel most fulfilled and content, and what circumstances or activities contribute to that feeling?
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What's a childhood memory or experience that has had a lasting impact on my adult life?
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Can I identify a challenging situation I've faced and the lessons I learned from it?
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What do I believe is my unique purpose or mission in life, and how am I working to fulfill it?
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How do I handle setbacks and obstacles, and what strategies help me overcome them?
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In what ways do I express gratitude and appreciation for the positive aspects of my life?
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Are there recurring patterns or habits in my life that I'd like to change or improve, and why?
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How do I approach self-care and maintain my physical, mental, and emotional well-being?
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What brings me a sense of inner peace and calm, and how can I incorporate more of these experiences into my daily life?
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What are my proudest achievements, and what strengths or qualities helped me reach them?
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How do I deal with self-doubt or moments of insecurity, and what strategies help me regain confidence?
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Can I identify a person or experience that significantly shaped my values and beliefs?
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How do I show kindness and compassion toward myself, and in what ways could I improve self-compassion?
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When I face a difficult decision, what process do I follow to weigh my options and make a choice?
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Are there relationships in my life that could benefit from improved communication or understanding, and how can I work toward that?
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What aspects of my life do I feel the most grateful for, and how does this gratitude influence my perspective?
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How do I handle moments of uncertainty or ambiguity, and what strategies help me find clarity and direction?
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Can I identify a recent experience that challenged my beliefs or viewpoints, and what insights did I gain from it?
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What's a fear or insecurity I've struggled with, and how has it influenced my life?
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What's the most significant loss or disappointment I've faced, and how did I cope with it?
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Can I describe a time when I felt completely alone or isolated, and how did I handle it?
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What's an aspect of my life or personality that I've worked hard to improve or change?
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What's a mistake or regret that still lingers in my mind, and what have I learned from it?
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Can I share a personal challenge I'm currently facing, and how do I feel about it?
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What role does self-compassion and self-acceptance play in my life, and how do I cultivate them?